You Are The Weakest Leak...

2 unreleased Beyonce songs has taken a leak... I'm just sayin'...



Chiiile, not today!

You Got 99 Problems and a Bey Ain't One...

Chiiiile... Word around the "don't drop the soap" wing of a federal prison is, an unlucky cellmate may be getting some hot camel on a stick soon if The NY Post article is accurate.

Have a couple sips of piping hot tea, chile... *pours*

In early September, AEG Chairman Richard Mays approached Jay-Z through his business partners and asked whether he would be interested in joining the consortium -- which at the time ranked last among six bidders seeking the lucrative project. . .

"[NY Governor] Paterson directly told [Las Vegas businessman Steve] Wynn he needed to have a minority partner, so he went and got Jay-Z. But when Wynn pulled out, Jay-Z was without a home," a source told The Post.

"AEG went and grabbed Jay-Z after his deal with Steve Wynn fell through." AEG jumped at the chance to recruit Jay-Z, who has become increasingly close to Paterson, sources said. The two dined together in June and hung out in the Hamptons.

UH OH, SPAGOOGLYO'S!!

Attention Whoring 101: Solange Knowles

Chile, this is a little old, and I was gonna refrain from posting this egghead clown on this blog altogether, but the words she farts up makes it hard to turn a blind side-eye to any longer.

After the Grammys, instead of celebrating her sisters multiple wins, the ever elegant Queen of the Basement Solange thought it to be a good idea to go on twitter and let everyone know HOW MUCH MORE ATTENTION BEYONCE SHOULD BE GETTING!! Bitch are you DRUNK??? Nevermind, I know the answer to that;




In her defense, she was probably just making a pallet on the floor. Bitch stays homeless... but i digress...

here is the a tweet by the mental midget herself;

"Im sorry but i'm having another kanye rant moment. My sister BROKE THE RECORD for the MOST GRAMMY'S IN ONE NIGHT BY ANY FEMALE so why do i KEEP seeing "other artist" as the Nights "big winner"....(*kanye shrug here) ???? Wowzers 2 some responses. Good darnit......im glad folks agree. Ok. On to the next one:)" (Solange Knowles' Twitter)

Is she talking about the same Grammys? Solange, care to explain your twitter meltdown to the 6 o'clock local news?



Just an adorable ray of sunshine, isn't she? I'll take one in every color...

Leak of the Week: Janet's HearBeatLove

Today, Rodney Jerkins aka Darkchild has leaked a new Janet track on his website called HeartBeatLove ft. Pitbull...



Music today is very euro/dance orinented, chile and if anyone should be able to pull it off, it should be dance royalty herself, Miss Janet.

unless you've been living under a lacefront wig, Janet has had a rough couple of years culminating in the death of her brother aka American Icon MJ, so things she had in motion prior (new film, new book, new album) she had to pump through and stay strong. Good for you, honeychile! WORK!!

Now let's work out that choreo and get these children TOGETHAH in the name!

P.S. My kitty has always wanted to have with Pitbull... meoow...

I'm Just Sayin'....

I Wanna Talk About Those Bathing Suits...

Soooooo, children. Looks as if little miss shoplifter's luck ran out in Germany. A German judge ruled that the design of one of her bathing suits was jacked like Jay-Z's drivers license photo. It's obvious bitch was once again "inspired by" someone elses hard work, and as a result, a judge ruled the "Video Phone" video be BANNED from further airing in Germany. HAAAA!!!

In what has to be one of the more bizarre copyright disputes, the underwear manufacturer Triumph sued Sony because Beyoncé was wearing copyright infringing underwear in her music video “Video Phone”. Seriously.

The design in question by Bulgarian designer Iskren Lozanov is shown on the right, the music video below (the infringement occurs at about 0.50′). This week, the 7th Civil Chamber of the Landgericht Munich upheld an ex parte injunction barring Sony from distributing the “Video Phone” clip in Germany.

Triumph argued Beyoncé was wearing an unauthorized reproduction of the Iskren Lozanov design. Sony countered that both designs were inspired by Picasso, but otherwise, there were few similarities. The slips, in particular, were wholly different. The judge disagreed: the Lozanov design was highly original and enjoyed a wide scope of protection, and was therefore infringed by the underwear worn by Beyoncé.

Sony’s lawyer announced that, after consultation with Beyoncé, he would most likely appeal the decision.

Hold, the line, I have a call coming in...

Hello Caller, you say what??

Chiiiile, Pleeeease: Alicia Keys

So, Alicia Keys is making a video that features Beyonce. Lets take a sneek peek behind the scenes...



Bitch, what are you doing?? Are you serious? So you're dippin it low and swingin the wig around? Really? Honestly? Seriously? With a straight face? And this isn't a joke? No foolin'? Did you pee on my leg and tell me its raining?

And another thing. The song is a CHOP, honey! Girl, BYE!! I thought higher of you than this, chile.

MAN DOWN, CODE TEN: Gunfight At Beyonce Concert!

Chiiiile, hammercy. What you are about to read is a HOT MESS! Word around the quinciñera is when Beyonce's concert was over in Salvador, Brazil recently, GUNMEN OPENED FIRE ON HER FANS LEAVING THE VENUE!!!

In related news, has anyone seen Solange?

But seriously honeychildren, true Beyonce stans are a little hard on the nervous system, but ummm... this is a FOOL! Chile, don't shoot the children. I'll just try to get them bitches together! I actually don't know what the motive was since the information is scare as of right now so this story, like Beyonce's breasts, is still developing...

In the meantime my thoughts and prayers go out to the young victims of the sensless act. My thoughts and prayers also go out to the mothers eardrums of kids who are Beyonce stans because they play her so much to the point where you wanna jam a rusty railroad spike down your earhole. That is a sensless act, too.

UPDATE: Several media sources has retracted this story of a gunfight after one of the "I Am" concerts In Brazil. I'm actually glad this story isn't true. But even still, if they just came out of a Beyonce concert, they have already been terrorized enough!

Hey, Cows!

Chiile, I have been sooo busy with work lately, it's been hard to keep up with the onslaught of fuckery, but luckily for you children, there has been a Buffet ala Bullshit being served up by your favorite stars so fast and furious it will peel the glue off a wig, chile. Check out these honeychildren letting your favorite star have it! Call it out, chile!

Russel Crowe is about to get his telephone-throwing arm back in shape. WAHOB

Paging Ricki Lake DESTINY'S REHAB

Run, Alicia RUN!! Kick those pumps off, hike up that hooker skirt and HAUL ASS, BITCH!!! DESTINY'S REHAB

Beyonce just woke up. In related news, Solange's shift just started. DLISTED

Let me guess. They wouldn't let Beyonce change the lyrics to "I Am The World" DESTINY'S REHAB

There's Plenty Single Ladies Where You're Headed...

CHIIIILE... My good Judys over at Destiny's Rehab just spilled some explosive tea! Word around Cell Block-H conjugal visit room is House Of Dereon is being sued by everyone with eyeballs claiming migranes and involuntary manslaughter. Ok, I made that up, but it's a thought.

In this breaking tea, Stylelist is reporting the lawsuit claims racketeering and conspiracy to commit fraud teas, honey. The manufacturer claims they shipped the gaudy shit out expecting to get paid one thing, and just like the cheap, greedy tricks that they are, tried to run a scam and now they're charged with multiple counts including violation of the Federal RICO Act. SCANDAL!

Miss Knowles, sugar... care to reply?

Hotel Camelfornia

Camels around the world have their humps in a bunch because their supreme leader Jay-Z has had a minor setback involving a hotel and some cash. No, we aren't talking about his honeymoon (this time). It's been said that Shawn Camel's hotel venture has gone bust and he's on the hook for millions of bushels of hay..

Shawn Carter, the rap music artist and Rocawear clothing business founder known as Jay-Z, sued the investment firm Highland Capital Management LP in a dispute over loan guarantees.
Carter, in his complaint filed yesterday in federal court in New York, claims Highland and co-defendant NexBank SSB are attempting to “bleed” from him funds in excess of those he and two other men pledged to pay when they guaranteed the non- principal obligations of a company planning to build a hotel in Manhattan’s west side neighborhood of Chelsea
he rap star is seeking a declaratory judgment that he has met those obligations. He’s also seeking damages of more than $3.7 million for the additional interest and other costs incurred while still being held liable under the agreements.
“In August 2007, a company controlled by Mr. Carter borrowed $52 million as a loan to purchase Manhattan property for a future boutique hotel,” Nina Devlin, a Highland spokeswoman, said in an e-mailed statement yesterday.

The loan, held by funds managed by Highland, matured in August and is in default, Devlin said.
“Highland Capital Management believes the claims asserted by Mr. Carter are meritless and will vigorously defend itself and intends to pursue the obligations owed to Highland’s investors,” she said.

SOURCE

SpillingTea: Chelsea Socks It To Beyonce

Chelsea Handler gave her opionion on the "it" girl at the Grammys on her E! television show "Chelsea, Lately" I hollered at what she said at the end because no truer words have ever been uttered, chile. And I know Beyonce stans will not be having this shit one iota. I'm sure Makaels keyboard is smokin' and sparkin' and shit as we speak lighting up twitter throwing a motherfuckin twitantrum. So, stay tuned for the remainder of this bit of tea, honey.

** and a quick chile,yes! to WAHOB & DR here and there!

The Cougar Files: Tina Knowles

MAC makeup supermodel extraordinaire and official Las Vegas hooker uniform designer Tina Knowles was seen bumping her corroded vagina on the dancefloor with some young stud who can give two wet farts about her. Word on Craigslist is, while attending her daughters Fuck Me Like A Dog In Heat Perfume launch party, she lured in an unsuspecting kid off of the street by rattling a box of Mike-n-Ikes in his direction. Then she pounced on her prey and hit him with her trusty pick up line... "After I'm done devouring your ding-ding, my lipstick won't smudge or budge... because you're worth it!" You gotta give it to her.. bitch is cougarific.

SOURCE

Destiny's New-Born Child

Word around the Planned Parenthood water cooler via MediaTakeOut (side-eye, but still) is Mathew's jump-off baby-mama just farted out a brand new Sasha Fierce, Jr. It's been whispered around the free clinic that she gave birth to a baby girl and the paternity test came out as expected.

Cut to TMZ footage as Mathew kicks the nurse over, bites the umbilical cord and yanks out the afterbirth, puts it in a leotard and push it out on stage.

"Precious, Take Yo Ass Down To The Welfare...

and pick up my damn OSCAR! I can take it to the pawn shop and get a pack of Kool Menthos and some pig feet with no hair in it you fat bitch!" No, but seriously kids...

Congratulations to Mo'Nique for Best Supporting, Gabourney Sidibe for Best Actress, Lee Daniels for Best Director and Precious for Best Picture.. Congrats to all the 2010 Oscar Nominees including Avatar, The Blind Side, Sandra Bullock and everything else nominated, chile.

You can find the list of nominees somewhere in HERE, honey!

And The Razzie Goes To...

Now before you pop champagne and start dancing to Single Ladies in a g-string in celebration, she's only nominated for now, but this is one award she is TRULY deserving of. I don't even see any other skank on that list, chile.

Eddie Murphy is also nominated for the "coveted" Razzie award. It's like a Dreamgirls reunion. That warms the cockles of my heart!

Well, good luck Beyonce! I'm rooting for you to take it home, and shut the haters down and let them know THEY ARE MESSING WITH THE WRONG QUEEN!

(shhh... don't tell them, just let them keep believing it's a good thing. You know her stans have "special needs")

If I Were A Bore...

Chiiile, PLEEEASE!! Incase you were fortunate enough to miss Beyonce's Grammy 2010 performance, I'm here to torture your senses by posting it here.

She rolled, she thrashed, she popped, she swung the Yak Pack Burnt Honey #13, she dam near ate it trippin down the stairs (yea bitch, i seenT ya!), sang someone else song (well, twice actually) and all to a SLOW song!! And she has 10 nominations, so what's up with the Alanis Morrisette song rammed and jammed all thru the middle? Eh.. awwwwkward!





WARNING: Please consult your doctor if you have high blood pressure, heartburn, upset stomach, indigestion or diarrhea.



Lord Father God. This is a fool!


Congrats, Bey on your 6 Grammy wins... *blank stare*

The Gay Jay Buffet

Lord hammercy Jesus. So many clips and snippets and shit has been dripping out from Jay Z within the past 48 hours it's hard to keep pace with the fuckery. From him saying Kanye was right about the infamous Beyonce outburst, to saying he doesn't believe in religion, and all things in between, it's just been one big anal-bead of confusion. What is he trying to promote now? You know this gay guy has something to either cover-up or sell, or both.

Get a whiff of the sudden Diarrhea of the mouth below:

MITCHELL: Sometimes his passions ruin him.

JAY-Z: Yeah, which is great. I like that, man! I really do. I mean, no one’s walking around here perfect. Everyone’s gonna make mistakes. That’s part of how you learn. I think Kanye . . . Well, I know he said what he believed. He was telling the truth.

MITCHELL: To which event are you referring?

JAY-Z: I’m talking about the Taylor Swift thing. I just think the timing of what he did was wrong, and that, of course, overshadowed everything. He believed that “Single Ladies” [by Jay-Z’s wife, Beyoncé] was a better video. I believed that. I think a lot of people believed that. You can’t give someone Video of the Year if they don’t win Best Female Video. I thought Best Female Video was something you won on the way to Video of the Year. But, hey, I guess it wasn’t—and that’s a whole other conversation about awards shows and artists.

MITCHELL: You’ve always had interesting takes on awards shows. I remember back in the day, you talked about the Grammys and said, “Well, they don’t take rap seriously, so why should I go? They don’t know what we do—and they don’t care about what we do.”

JAY-Z: It’s just honest, man—they really didn’t. I’ve always seen awards shows for what they are. For the awards show people, it’s about sponsorships—it’s not about recognizing anyone’s art, because if you get into the business of recognizing art, then you have to get it right all the time. You have to get it right. You can’t have the woman who wins Video of the Year not win Best Female Video. I mean, Herbie Hancock
is great, but you can’t have him beat the Kanye album that year. I mean, come on, seriously. That can’t happen. That just lets me know that the people who get to pick these ballots just check the only name they know. I think that’s what’s happening with rap music now.

MITCHELL: Yeah?

JAY-Z: I think it’s a bunch of people who don’t know anything about rap, and have probably never even heard a Kanye West album, are doing the nominating, and they say, “Kanye West. I know that name. That’s the guy who made the comments about the president that time! He’s nominated!” That’s how the process works, and I think that’s part of Kanye’s frustration. Me, I look at it for what it is. But Kanye is so passionate about it. I mean, the guy shot three “Jesus Walks” videos. Three. Two of them he shot with his own money just so he could get it right. He really cares about it. And then, back to the original point, his passion kicks in and he takes things too far . . . He doesn’t realize that that girl, Taylor Swift, is just like him. That was her moment. It wasn’t her fault. She didn’t do anything. It’s not her awards show. So he just did the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time.

SOURCE: Interview Magazine

Spillin Tea: The Michelle Williams Edition

Word on the trick track is when Michelle first met Destiny's Child (Back when DC4 opened up for HER when she was Monica's back-up singer) She was FORBIDDEN to communicate with LeToya & LaTavia.. SHAAADE!!




You can read the rest of the interview below:

1. So what has Michelle Williams been doing since the release of her last album UnExpected?
Of course I’m still working on new music. I spent the entire summer in London doing Chicago, and I will be back on Broadway in February doing the same thing. I have about two weeks of rehearsal because I believe there are a little differences in the New York show and the London show. I think 2 weeks is enough to make sure it’s still in my blood, I did it in Morocco for New Years and it was pretty much still there (laughs).

2. I have the record, and I myself was sure that the album would be a huge success with songs such as “Hello HeartBreak”, “The Greatest”, “Private Party”, and so on. Were you surprised with the lack of sales?
I was surprised. I was very excited that it garnered positive reception even from publications that I would have never thought would have given me the great reviews that they gave me. However, I was disappointed in the sales and disappointed that people still didn’t know it was out. But that’s why you keep going and let people be aware of you, so that’s what 2010 is all about.

3. Were you targeting a certain audience, specifically a gay audience with the techno beats and pop sound?
Actually I wasn’t. Now you know Rico Love and you know Rico Love was not sitting in the studio snapping his fingers saying this one right here we gonna do it for the kids (laughs). We just knew that there was this Euro crave going on, or something that we could tap in to, so that’s how we started making the music. You know, I do music for everybody, gay/straight, black white. There were a lot of the toughest guys that really loved “Hello Heartbreak”.

4. Do you have any plans for a re-release of that album?
There were plans for a re-release and there were plans for Europe to do a proper release, however I am just as stunned as everybody else that it didn’t take place. No reason why, it just didn’t happen.

5. With your next album, will you return to gospel or continue in the pop genre?
It will be the same as UNEXPECTED as far as the vibe I was going for. I think that I might add a couple more live musical elements, but I think I was on to something great. But who knows, maybe after that I will return to my gospel roots. I’m blessed to have two musical genres that I can fall back on.

6. Have you started on the new album yet?
I have started, my blackberry is full of concepts and the people that I would like to work with (laughs). I have dibbled and dabbled in the studio and laid down some demos, and who knows, those demos may be songs that go on my next album.

7. How did you feel about some of the critics opinions when you decided to do a pop album versus gospel?
It was crazy because the masses or majority of the world knew me as Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child and we were an R&B, pop group. It was like what did I go back to, what did I neglect. Both world’s can be very protective of their artist, and in the gospel world they want to keep their music “purer”. People have to realize most of got out start in the church as little children. But I have people that will still support me regardless of which genre I do.

8. Now we know that you started out as a backup singer for Monica, when was the last time that you have spoken to her?
We have talked on the phone and texted each other. We have funny moments because I watch her show on BET and if I see something funny then I will text her about it. I’m very happy for her; she is really doing her thing. She’s an awesome mother now for 2 little boys. She has always been a very nurturing person and I’m really proud of her.

9. Now to Destinys Child, how did you get introduced to the girls?
Well at the time, one of Monica’s dancers was actually Destiny’s Child choreographer. She told DC about me and I got the phone call. Actually DC opened up for Monica while we were on tour. A lot of people don’t know this but when I would meet Destiny’s Child it would only be Beyonce and Kelly. I recently met Letoya for the first time about 2 or 3 years ago. I have never met Latavia, I don’t know of anything about her, other than what is put out in the media. But I would only meet Beyonce and Kelly, and when I got into the group I always wondered how weird that was that I would only have communications with B and Kelly. But when I flew to Houston I just sung a song for them and that was it. So I waited a couple days and then I got the phone call and the rest is history.

10. How did you guys feel when the group broke up? Did you guys cry?
Well for the Destiny Fulfilled tour we cried, but I think during the last show we were numb. I don’t think we even believed it until months later when we weren’t doing shows together. All of us dealt with that separation in our own way. I cried a lot, but then I was like why am I crying when I can pick up the phone and call them. But we still hang out when were in each others cities, or if we are all in LA at the same time. We still hold that love for each other so we know for sure that that love will always be there.

11. Will the group ever do another album together?
I really don’t know, I’m giving you the honest to God answer, I really don’t.

12. What do you think the music industry is lacking in right now?
I think that a lot of guys have fallen into doing things that aren’t them. But I think a lot of artist like Maxwell and Ledisi are good at being them. I think a lot of us are guilty of putting what we want to do on the backburner to do music that we think will sell. But when you really be you then that is when you will succeed. I believe Lady GaGa every time I see her perform. I know Lady GaGa so I know that she isn’t putting on an act. That is her both on and off the stage, she is a sweet girl. You will believe Lady GaGa when you see her, at least I know I do. So I think more and more artists have to believe in what we are doing.

SOURCE

From The Captain Obvious Files: Michelle Williams Leaves MWM

Yes, Ray Charles with an infected pink-eye could see this shit coming...

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
January 12, 2010

STATEMENT REGARDING GRAMMY-AWARD WINNING SINGER MICHELLE WILLIAMS DISSOLVING HER MANAGEMENT ARRANGEMENT WITH MATHEW KNOWLES AND MUSIC WORLD ENTERTAINMENT

“After much prayer and consideration I have decided to part ways from my management team, Mathew Knowles and Music World Entertainment. From my time in Destiny’s Child to my solo career, I am grateful for everything Mathew and his team has done for me. We’ve shared great success together. However, as I move in a new direction in my career, I felt it was time. I wish Mathew Knowles and the Music World Entertainment family all the best.”

Well slap me in the face with a no-shit stick. So the master-plan is FINALLY complete now. It's just a hot mess that it took as long as it did for her to depart.

I'm sure Beyonce is just so distraught over this. Mathew is so torn up about it he has to go out and do a bump of coke off of a random hookers ass cheek.

Let us all bow our heads and pray that Beyonce and Mathew will get through this trying time! Let the chuuch say AMEN.