Dawson's Creek Called, They Want Their Theme Song Back...

Today, "King B" dropped another load of her groundbreaking, mesmerizing new flop single in the form of one of the worst things I've ever heard called "Best Thing I Never Had" Aside from the fact that the single should come with a label approved by medical doctors as a sure-fire way to cure incurable insomnia, some of the lyrics are as follows, and are very VERY ironic!

"...sucks to be Beyonce you right now..."

"...what goes around comes back around, Beyonce..."

"...there was a time I thought that you did everything right Beyonce..."

"...when I think of the time I almost loved you Beyonce, you showed your ass and I saw the real you Beyonce..."

"...i'm so over you Beyonce, so baby good lookin' out"

and blahh blahhh blahhhhh.... I mean talk about the pot callin' the kettle black, honey. Chile, sounds like a swan song if I've ever heard one. Aside from the fact that it's annoying as an itchy asscrack, it sounds like something that was stolen right off the set of some sappy, tired, cheesy, nerdy ass show on the CW starring bad acting teenagers in high school or some crap. Yea, i'll pass on this one, too...

Yes miss Bey, looks like your pussymobile is finally out of gas, on 4 flat tires and you're stranded on the side of the road while Kelly is riding by, top down with the wind in her hair BLASTING her #1 R&B smash hit, Motivation. My, how the lacefront has turned!

Taking A Leak: New Beyonce Track "1+1"

If you heard all of your neighborhood dogs howling at the moon tonight, it wasn't an ambulance in the area speeding to the ER, it was just a Beyonce track taking a leak onto the planet tonight. If Prince went into labor and gave birth to a wounded reindeer out his ASS, it would sound like Beyonce's new smash leak 1+1. I'm no mathematician, but I never knew 1+1 equaled skunk farts and demon burps, but once again, I was never that great at math.

If (and only if) you are a daring soul, take a listen.

Thief (Who Ruined The World)

HAMMERCY JESUS! I have been gone far too long!! I have to apologize for my prolonged absence, I have just been so unbelievably busy with amazing things going on, it's been a crying FOOL, but for this very momentous occasion, I come to you swimming through the thickest new growth roots and standing strong on the tallest ass pad known to man to proclaim that after listening to a clip of that SMOLDERING 4-ALARM CHILI BURNT TO A DAM CRISP EXTRA WELL DONE OPEN FLAME BROILED ASS HOT MESSSSSSSSS of Beyonce's new "song", I have to say THAT DAMN TEARS IT WITH THIS LADY! I can't with her, I can't with her delusional ass STANS, I can't with Makael and four motherfuckers that LOOK like him, and I can't with the world at large if you let this crap continue unscathed!

So if you want to hear HER EARTHSHATTERING NEW MUSIC THAT SHE CAME UP WITH ALL ON HER OWN, click the link below to listen to what 20 seconds of pure, concentrated, new born HELL sounds like.



and btw, Major Lazer (ft. Vybz Kartel) did it better...



Tootles, till next time....

Leak of The Week: Kelly Rowland - Commander

In the Can't Keep A Good Bitch Down files, Kelly Rowland has taken a leak with her new song Commander. I have to say that this dance/pop sound is not my favorite of all genres, having said that Kelly SLAYED honTea!

While Kelly is on the verge of having another international hit, her ex manager Mathew is somewhere having another international hit of cocaine up his Dustbuster vacuum lookin' ass nose. I'm just sayin...



Take a listen to "Commander" below...

Solange Has Taken A Leak

Chile, Solange has pulled out his wee-wee and taken a leak all over your computer, honey!



fuck this shit, I'm filing charges, honey! Mental and emotional distress.

You Are The Weakest Leak...

2 unreleased Beyonce songs has taken a leak... I'm just sayin'...



Chiiile, not today!

Leak of the Week: Janet's HearBeatLove

Today, Rodney Jerkins aka Darkchild has leaked a new Janet track on his website called HeartBeatLove ft. Pitbull...



Music today is very euro/dance orinented, chile and if anyone should be able to pull it off, it should be dance royalty herself, Miss Janet.

unless you've been living under a lacefront wig, Janet has had a rough couple of years culminating in the death of her brother aka American Icon MJ, so things she had in motion prior (new film, new book, new album) she had to pump through and stay strong. Good for you, honeychile! WORK!!

Now let's work out that choreo and get these children TOGETHAH in the name!

P.S. My kitty has always wanted to have with Pitbull... meoow...