If I Were A Bore...

Chiiile, PLEEEASE!! Incase you were fortunate enough to miss Beyonce's Grammy 2010 performance, I'm here to torture your senses by posting it here.

She rolled, she thrashed, she popped, she swung the Yak Pack Burnt Honey #13, she dam near ate it trippin down the stairs (yea bitch, i seenT ya!), sang someone else song (well, twice actually) and all to a SLOW song!! And she has 10 nominations, so what's up with the Alanis Morrisette song rammed and jammed all thru the middle? Eh.. awwwwkward!





WARNING: Please consult your doctor if you have high blood pressure, heartburn, upset stomach, indigestion or diarrhea.



Lord Father God. This is a fool!


Congrats, Bey on your 6 Grammy wins... *blank stare*

The Gay Jay Buffet

Lord hammercy Jesus. So many clips and snippets and shit has been dripping out from Jay Z within the past 48 hours it's hard to keep pace with the fuckery. From him saying Kanye was right about the infamous Beyonce outburst, to saying he doesn't believe in religion, and all things in between, it's just been one big anal-bead of confusion. What is he trying to promote now? You know this gay guy has something to either cover-up or sell, or both.

Get a whiff of the sudden Diarrhea of the mouth below:

MITCHELL: Sometimes his passions ruin him.

JAY-Z: Yeah, which is great. I like that, man! I really do. I mean, no one’s walking around here perfect. Everyone’s gonna make mistakes. That’s part of how you learn. I think Kanye . . . Well, I know he said what he believed. He was telling the truth.

MITCHELL: To which event are you referring?

JAY-Z: I’m talking about the Taylor Swift thing. I just think the timing of what he did was wrong, and that, of course, overshadowed everything. He believed that “Single Ladies” [by Jay-Z’s wife, Beyoncé] was a better video. I believed that. I think a lot of people believed that. You can’t give someone Video of the Year if they don’t win Best Female Video. I thought Best Female Video was something you won on the way to Video of the Year. But, hey, I guess it wasn’t—and that’s a whole other conversation about awards shows and artists.

MITCHELL: You’ve always had interesting takes on awards shows. I remember back in the day, you talked about the Grammys and said, “Well, they don’t take rap seriously, so why should I go? They don’t know what we do—and they don’t care about what we do.”

JAY-Z: It’s just honest, man—they really didn’t. I’ve always seen awards shows for what they are. For the awards show people, it’s about sponsorships—it’s not about recognizing anyone’s art, because if you get into the business of recognizing art, then you have to get it right all the time. You have to get it right. You can’t have the woman who wins Video of the Year not win Best Female Video. I mean, Herbie Hancock
is great, but you can’t have him beat the Kanye album that year. I mean, come on, seriously. That can’t happen. That just lets me know that the people who get to pick these ballots just check the only name they know. I think that’s what’s happening with rap music now.

MITCHELL: Yeah?

JAY-Z: I think it’s a bunch of people who don’t know anything about rap, and have probably never even heard a Kanye West album, are doing the nominating, and they say, “Kanye West. I know that name. That’s the guy who made the comments about the president that time! He’s nominated!” That’s how the process works, and I think that’s part of Kanye’s frustration. Me, I look at it for what it is. But Kanye is so passionate about it. I mean, the guy shot three “Jesus Walks” videos. Three. Two of them he shot with his own money just so he could get it right. He really cares about it. And then, back to the original point, his passion kicks in and he takes things too far . . . He doesn’t realize that that girl, Taylor Swift, is just like him. That was her moment. It wasn’t her fault. She didn’t do anything. It’s not her awards show. So he just did the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time.

SOURCE: Interview Magazine

Spillin Tea: The Michelle Williams Edition

Word on the trick track is when Michelle first met Destiny's Child (Back when DC4 opened up for HER when she was Monica's back-up singer) She was FORBIDDEN to communicate with LeToya & LaTavia.. SHAAADE!!




You can read the rest of the interview below:

1. So what has Michelle Williams been doing since the release of her last album UnExpected?
Of course I’m still working on new music. I spent the entire summer in London doing Chicago, and I will be back on Broadway in February doing the same thing. I have about two weeks of rehearsal because I believe there are a little differences in the New York show and the London show. I think 2 weeks is enough to make sure it’s still in my blood, I did it in Morocco for New Years and it was pretty much still there (laughs).

2. I have the record, and I myself was sure that the album would be a huge success with songs such as “Hello HeartBreak”, “The Greatest”, “Private Party”, and so on. Were you surprised with the lack of sales?
I was surprised. I was very excited that it garnered positive reception even from publications that I would have never thought would have given me the great reviews that they gave me. However, I was disappointed in the sales and disappointed that people still didn’t know it was out. But that’s why you keep going and let people be aware of you, so that’s what 2010 is all about.

3. Were you targeting a certain audience, specifically a gay audience with the techno beats and pop sound?
Actually I wasn’t. Now you know Rico Love and you know Rico Love was not sitting in the studio snapping his fingers saying this one right here we gonna do it for the kids (laughs). We just knew that there was this Euro crave going on, or something that we could tap in to, so that’s how we started making the music. You know, I do music for everybody, gay/straight, black white. There were a lot of the toughest guys that really loved “Hello Heartbreak”.

4. Do you have any plans for a re-release of that album?
There were plans for a re-release and there were plans for Europe to do a proper release, however I am just as stunned as everybody else that it didn’t take place. No reason why, it just didn’t happen.

5. With your next album, will you return to gospel or continue in the pop genre?
It will be the same as UNEXPECTED as far as the vibe I was going for. I think that I might add a couple more live musical elements, but I think I was on to something great. But who knows, maybe after that I will return to my gospel roots. I’m blessed to have two musical genres that I can fall back on.

6. Have you started on the new album yet?
I have started, my blackberry is full of concepts and the people that I would like to work with (laughs). I have dibbled and dabbled in the studio and laid down some demos, and who knows, those demos may be songs that go on my next album.

7. How did you feel about some of the critics opinions when you decided to do a pop album versus gospel?
It was crazy because the masses or majority of the world knew me as Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child and we were an R&B, pop group. It was like what did I go back to, what did I neglect. Both world’s can be very protective of their artist, and in the gospel world they want to keep their music “purer”. People have to realize most of got out start in the church as little children. But I have people that will still support me regardless of which genre I do.

8. Now we know that you started out as a backup singer for Monica, when was the last time that you have spoken to her?
We have talked on the phone and texted each other. We have funny moments because I watch her show on BET and if I see something funny then I will text her about it. I’m very happy for her; she is really doing her thing. She’s an awesome mother now for 2 little boys. She has always been a very nurturing person and I’m really proud of her.

9. Now to Destinys Child, how did you get introduced to the girls?
Well at the time, one of Monica’s dancers was actually Destiny’s Child choreographer. She told DC about me and I got the phone call. Actually DC opened up for Monica while we were on tour. A lot of people don’t know this but when I would meet Destiny’s Child it would only be Beyonce and Kelly. I recently met Letoya for the first time about 2 or 3 years ago. I have never met Latavia, I don’t know of anything about her, other than what is put out in the media. But I would only meet Beyonce and Kelly, and when I got into the group I always wondered how weird that was that I would only have communications with B and Kelly. But when I flew to Houston I just sung a song for them and that was it. So I waited a couple days and then I got the phone call and the rest is history.

10. How did you guys feel when the group broke up? Did you guys cry?
Well for the Destiny Fulfilled tour we cried, but I think during the last show we were numb. I don’t think we even believed it until months later when we weren’t doing shows together. All of us dealt with that separation in our own way. I cried a lot, but then I was like why am I crying when I can pick up the phone and call them. But we still hang out when were in each others cities, or if we are all in LA at the same time. We still hold that love for each other so we know for sure that that love will always be there.

11. Will the group ever do another album together?
I really don’t know, I’m giving you the honest to God answer, I really don’t.

12. What do you think the music industry is lacking in right now?
I think that a lot of guys have fallen into doing things that aren’t them. But I think a lot of artist like Maxwell and Ledisi are good at being them. I think a lot of us are guilty of putting what we want to do on the backburner to do music that we think will sell. But when you really be you then that is when you will succeed. I believe Lady GaGa every time I see her perform. I know Lady GaGa so I know that she isn’t putting on an act. That is her both on and off the stage, she is a sweet girl. You will believe Lady GaGa when you see her, at least I know I do. So I think more and more artists have to believe in what we are doing.

SOURCE

From The Captain Obvious Files: Michelle Williams Leaves MWM

Yes, Ray Charles with an infected pink-eye could see this shit coming...

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
January 12, 2010

STATEMENT REGARDING GRAMMY-AWARD WINNING SINGER MICHELLE WILLIAMS DISSOLVING HER MANAGEMENT ARRANGEMENT WITH MATHEW KNOWLES AND MUSIC WORLD ENTERTAINMENT

“After much prayer and consideration I have decided to part ways from my management team, Mathew Knowles and Music World Entertainment. From my time in Destiny’s Child to my solo career, I am grateful for everything Mathew and his team has done for me. We’ve shared great success together. However, as I move in a new direction in my career, I felt it was time. I wish Mathew Knowles and the Music World Entertainment family all the best.”

Well slap me in the face with a no-shit stick. So the master-plan is FINALLY complete now. It's just a hot mess that it took as long as it did for her to depart.

I'm sure Beyonce is just so distraught over this. Mathew is so torn up about it he has to go out and do a bump of coke off of a random hookers ass cheek.

Let us all bow our heads and pray that Beyonce and Mathew will get through this trying time! Let the chuuch say AMEN.

Heated Brandy...

Chiiile! Now Brandy (and yes I love her like those little seeds on a kiwi) has glued on her catwoman press-on nails and told Danger to watch her mouth via twitter:

"I need for danger to watch her tongue!!! To say my brother is gay because he didn't return your calls is DUMB.. GO GET HELP!!! #bestadvice"



and not only that, but apparently Danger was talkin about another Young Buck (not from G-Unit) but once the rapper got a whiff of what was going on, he sent Ray J a tweet and queefed:



"WHAT UP NIGGA THIS IS THE REAL YOUNG BUCK! DANGER GOT ME TIED UP WIT YALL DRAMA!!LOL SHE SHOULD BE CLEAR BOUT WHO DA FUCK SHE TALKIN BOUT"

Now you cunts know I'm a messy girl at times, but this is a PIPIN HOT MESS!

Booty Brother Rebuttal: Ray J

Power-bottom Ray J has come out swinging (and snapping, twisting and neck rolling) denying allegations that he and ex G-Unit artist Young Buck has been slapping nut sacks together. From the sound of his bassless voice, He's not making the case. Here he sounds like hes walking the Butch Queen category from the Ballroom Scene. Leyomi, honey, you better get your dips together chile, because Gay J is coming for your crown, precious.

Ray J. + Young Buck = Booty Brothers?

Word on the Ho-Stroll is that Ray J. and Young Buck are bumpin stick-pussies in the still of the night. Considering the source, sounds to me like bitch is trying to get a spin-off reality show by saying outrageous things. We all know that bitch is one nap short of a kiddie perm, but stranger things have happened...

Is Fantasia For Real?

Check out the first episode of Fantasia's new reality show "Fantasia For Real"

Now I love some 'Tasia like someone from bible studies, but CHIIIIILE!

The show looks entertaining and she is WERQIN the Rihanna hair, honeys, but I don't see how she can put up w/ that delusional ass brother of hers. He needs a job and like quickly or he would find himself out on the street. I won't spoil it incase you didn't see it yet, but if he did that shit to me (at the end) i would lodge my foot in his ass and do a tap-dance on his kidneys!

Bey Got the Game on Pad-Lock

Booty pad-lock that is! Check out this Honeychile's hilarious video.




Chile, I almost swallowed my tongue at the end. I can't.. not tonight!

Speaking of CatastroBey...

It looks as tho Miss Bey can't catch a break. Word on the street is Trinidad and Tobago is considering canceling Beyonce's performance because the Queen of Pop-Cooch-For-A-Dollar's performance will end up costing the country 30 million dollars, and it would interfere with the carnival festival. Chile, they could still have a carninval; Bey could spit ping-pong balls out of her vagina, and Jay-Z could be the bearded lady.

A Looming Beysaster

Hey there honeycows! I missed you, but you know a lady had to get her affairs in order and come back fresh in 2010, and it looks like the fuckery just wont let up.

Gums are bumpin and tongues are wagging all over the states (and abroad) about Miss Knowles-Camel Carter performing for the brother of a terrorist. Well, that sound about right to me since she's been terrorizing me with her screechin, hollerin, yodellin and pelvic thrusts.

This ain't the best way to start off the the '10, Miss Honey!

Here is her spokeswhores official statement:

"The party in St. Bart’s on New Year’s Eve, with Beyoncé in performance, was hosted by Muatsim-Billah Gaddafi, not his brother Moutassim Bilal “Hannibal” Gaddafi, as reported in the press.

Her agents and management firm made the decision to confirm the private performance. The annual party had a long history of booking internationally known artists both American and foreign for events around the world, including Cannes.

Past performers in St. Bart’s have included Timbaland, Enrique Iglesias and Mariah Carey. Guests at this year’s party included singer Usher, former BET CEO Bob Johnson, actress Lindsay Lohan and music industry vets, Russell Simmons, Kevin Liles and L.A. Reid."

Hold it! Pump brakes, bitches! Now is this chile trying to throw people under the bus? honeygirl, give me a lasting break, chile!