About Beyonce's 5 Finger Discount Billboard Awards Performance...

Yesterday was Sunday, so that must mean for some it's time to violate a couple of the 10 commandments. Mostly THOU SHALT NOT STEAL & THOU SHALT NOT LIE (aka bare false witness). So, Beyonce was given the award for being the most unoriginal scam artist of the MILLENIUM yesterday, and although I didn't watch that bullfart (I had more important things to do like wash my hair, paint my toenails, feed the cat, do crossword puzzles, etc...) I already know (without watching) that it was going to be a show full of dandruff flakes, crotch-rot, delusion, theft, lies & videotape. Maybe I'm psychic, but from what I'm hearing, that's EXACTLY what it was, chile.

Glad I spent my time wisely, because now my hair is bouncy fresh and my toes are really cute! :)

Has-Been to Debut Video on Has-Been Show

Even though the ratings are in the camode, and her single is on the charts down-low-er than her husband Jay-Z "alleged" secret sex life, American Idol looks to pull a stunt to breathe hot funky halitosis breath back into their over-the-hill, tired, worn out, past its prime, run its course, beating a dead horse ass show, with the debut of an over-the-hill, worn out, run its course, past it's prime, wearing a dead horse-wig chick with the hottest breath in the game's highly anticipated (HAA) video premiere. I haven't watched nobody's American Idol since they voted off Jennifer Hudson, and chile, thats about the only "Idol" they have cranked out of that God-forsaken show!

Here is the tea from Vladtv.com via Beyonce's website and her cousin Angela Beyince's twitter.

Bey's official fansite released a statement confirming that her video will debut on the famed talent show on May 18th. Her cousin, Angie Beyince also tweeted in support saying “Tune in Wednesday May 18th to see Beyonce on American Idol.”

Shhhh... be really quiet. You hear that sound?? It's the sound of J. Lo plucking her eyes out of her head and rolling them across her dressing room floor! I mean, the NERVE of this Beyonce chick; after all the 5 finger discounts she pulled on J.Lo throughout her carrer, now she has to sit there with a plastic grin on her face and be tortured with that HOT MESS?? And I'll bet you 2 tons of wig glue Beyonce is gonna say she though of this great idea all by her big-headed self, even though on the last SKORPION SHOW video, they begged her to do it! She's so texas smart, ain't she?! I mean everybody that eats their boogers like it's Popeye's chicken is smart like that. Everyone knows that. It's a scientific fact! Wikipedia it, if you don't believe me.

This old lady's desperation knows no bounds!

Another Day, Another Beyonce Lawsuit...

No, the planet earth's lawyer didn't file a lawsuit seeking damages due to pain, suffering, excessive diarrhea and hearing-loss after listening to Bey's new smash shit Who RUIN The World (Whores), not yet at least, but they are gettin their paperwork together.

Instead, these court papers reveal a company (who should have known better) named Gate Five is suing the tooth plaque and coochie-crust off of Beyonce's ass to the tune of 100 MILLION SLUT-BUCKS for;

1. Being a GREEDY ASS GREEDY BITCH (duh...)

2. Being a MORALLY REPREHENSIBLE HUMAN BEING (double-duh...)

3. Ruining 70 people's christmas by forcing them out of a job the week before christmas because of reasons 1 and 2 (helmet wearing triple-duuhhhhh).


Here's the TMZ tea

A video game company called Gate Five filed papers today in NY -- in which they claim they had a deal in place in 2010 to create a game with Beyonce called, "Starpower: Beyonce."

According to the docs, things went awry during a "crucial moment in the project's development" when Beyonce made "an extortionate demand" for more money -- even though the two sides already had a deal in place.

Gate Five claims her move "drove 70 people into unemployment, the week before Christmas" ... and notes that one of the project's backers described her conduct as "morally reprehensible."

The company claims it is entitled to the $6.7 mil it invested into the venture -- as well as more than $100 million in profits Gate Five believes it would have earned had Beyonce honored the agreement.

SOURCE

Here is Beyonce's official statement on the matter:


GIFSoup

Cops Pull Over Some Old Lady...

So, Miss "I just got my license" Knowles (even though since early Destiny's Child, she'd been driving around in a Jaguar while her bandmate had to hitchike a ride in her mamas old Mazda, but I digress...) was stopped by a cop that had no idea who the hell she was *insert Nelson's HAA-HAAAA laugh here* when he seen a 1,000 pound wig on wheels in heels driving down the street while texting. Here's the tea...

“Beyoncé was really embarrassed because she only recently got her driver’s license. She tried to charm that cop and told him she had no idea that texting while driving was against the law. He had no idea who she was. He just slapped her with the ticket, which was worth more than $100!”

SOURCE



If this is true,






Chile, but if you go to the source link, this happened LAST month? Ummm, so... why... are... they... um... just... now.... um.. chile, nevermind! But,to be on the
safe side....

*stiff, stern side-eye*

Another Day, Another Camel Suit...

So the latest news flying across the desert is Jay-Z is being SUED by a private plane company for not paying in full. Here's the tea...

18 hours of flight time at $4,500-per-hour (discounted from $6,000-per-hour) ... $81,000
Catering for 17 domestic flights ($500-per-flight) .... $8,500
Catering for 4 international flights ($750-per-flight) ... $3,000
International fees ... $8,500
Taxes ... $12,285
Luxury trip to England ... $24,200

It all adds up to $137,485.00 ... which is why most people just fly coach.

SOURCE


Okay, so instantly a few things come to mind, here.

1. Can't he afford his own plane by now? If John Travolta can afford one, I'm sure Jay-Z can afford one, too.

2. Da fuck wrong with this bitch??

And don't give me this "it was an oversight" crap, either. Why didn't he just give them his Camel Express Card? and I don't want to hear about "my people dropped the ball" bullsh!t. Do you need your people to wipe your ass, too? You know what the hell you're spending and when you're spending it. People have bills to pay, they don't have time to wait until "your people" get their crap together!

Sorry for being in such a funky mood, but this queen just PISSES ME OFF!!

Kelly PWNS Mathew

Chile... So I was right in the middle of stabbing a Single Ladies Onsie with that voodoo pin Tina let me borrow, when I stumbled across this recent interview of Kelly Rowland by Perez Hilton.





Girl, so cut to Perez asking why Mathew felt the need (to stop doing bumps of powder with Lindsay Lohan long enough) to release a statement on a Destiny's Child reunion. This is where Miss Kelly SERVED Mathew the tea in her own little Kelly way, and I LIVE!

(wait.. so does this mean... there's still a....? oh crap!)

This Is Why They Don't Love You...

B.B. Homewrecker really did it this time, Lucy. Beyonce knowing nothing of the Good Neighbor Policy has been made clear because a neighbor of the home "Why Don't You Love Me" was shot in is suing the cigarette butts out of Beyonce for forcing herself down everyone's throat (and possibly forcing all the neighborhood men down her throat, chile).

After she finished blocking driveways with her traffic stopping booty-pads, Here's the TMZ tea..

Philip Markowitz alleges in a lawsuit obtained by TMZ ...his peace and quiet was shattered the morning of March 26, 2010, when the film crew "invaded his neighborhood" ... waking him out of a peaceful sleep at 7 AM.

That nightmare was followed by a series of intrusions, Markowitz claims. Markowitz says during the morning ... every time he tried leaving his house the crew was blocking his driveway. He went in and out and in and out .... and each time, he says, there was some obstacle in his way.

Now it gets really good. Markowitz says he "missed several business calls while arguing calmly in his driveway." By 11:30 AM, "He demanded compensation for the trespass on his property and the inconvenience and delay he had already suffered."

In fact, Markowitz says he told someone from the crew that he's gotten upwards of $10,000 for the use of his property, but says he was told he couldn't be paid this time because it was a "low budget film shoot."

But Markowitz doesn't buy it. He's suing Beyonce and the production company for unspecified damages ... including the dreaded punitive damages.

Read the Official Documents

MAT..uh.. I mean BET Bans Ciara "Ride" Video

To make room for the pussywaggon, video hoes with phones, single ladies wearing a tampon string as an outfit, bloods and crips, simulating orgasms w/ waterguns etc. etc., BET had to finally draw the line somewhere.. with CIARA!! What the fuckity fuck fuck?

I ain't trying to stir up no caca, but this sounds like the crooked works of *cough* insiders *cough* giving BET *cough* $$$uggestion$ *cough* on who they should or shouldn't play.

Here is Ciara confirming the ban:



Alright now, I got my eye on you bitches.

Spillin' Tea: LeToya & Michelle Collab?

Yes, honTeas, bask in it! LeToya Luckett tweeted a pic of her and Michelle Williams on stage singing a song while both girls are pouring cryptic brace yourself for a surprise kinda teas chile! Whatever it is, brang it on!! That would be a real gag if all the ex-Destiny's children got together and stormed the "Queens" castle!

I'll have extra butter on that popcorn, please!

Spillin' Tea: Wha's on your Mind?

Hey, honeys! It's been a crazy week, spring is around the corner and there's alot of tea going on around the world, honey; from the Oscars, to the GaGa/Beyonce Telephone vid. So This is an open thread to spill whatever tea that's in your cup, chile.

There's Plenty Single Ladies Where You're Headed...

CHIIIILE... My good Judys over at Destiny's Rehab just spilled some explosive tea! Word around Cell Block-H conjugal visit room is House Of Dereon is being sued by everyone with eyeballs claiming migranes and involuntary manslaughter. Ok, I made that up, but it's a thought.

In this breaking tea, Stylelist is reporting the lawsuit claims racketeering and conspiracy to commit fraud teas, honey. The manufacturer claims they shipped the gaudy shit out expecting to get paid one thing, and just like the cheap, greedy tricks that they are, tried to run a scam and now they're charged with multiple counts including violation of the Federal RICO Act. SCANDAL!

Miss Knowles, sugar... care to reply?

SpillingTea: Chelsea Socks It To Beyonce

Chelsea Handler gave her opionion on the "it" girl at the Grammys on her E! television show "Chelsea, Lately" I hollered at what she said at the end because no truer words have ever been uttered, chile. And I know Beyonce stans will not be having this shit one iota. I'm sure Makaels keyboard is smokin' and sparkin' and shit as we speak lighting up twitter throwing a motherfuckin twitantrum. So, stay tuned for the remainder of this bit of tea, honey.

** and a quick chile,yes! to WAHOB & DR here and there!

Spillin Tea: The Michelle Williams Edition

Word on the trick track is when Michelle first met Destiny's Child (Back when DC4 opened up for HER when she was Monica's back-up singer) She was FORBIDDEN to communicate with LeToya & LaTavia.. SHAAADE!!




You can read the rest of the interview below:

1. So what has Michelle Williams been doing since the release of her last album UnExpected?
Of course I’m still working on new music. I spent the entire summer in London doing Chicago, and I will be back on Broadway in February doing the same thing. I have about two weeks of rehearsal because I believe there are a little differences in the New York show and the London show. I think 2 weeks is enough to make sure it’s still in my blood, I did it in Morocco for New Years and it was pretty much still there (laughs).

2. I have the record, and I myself was sure that the album would be a huge success with songs such as “Hello HeartBreak”, “The Greatest”, “Private Party”, and so on. Were you surprised with the lack of sales?
I was surprised. I was very excited that it garnered positive reception even from publications that I would have never thought would have given me the great reviews that they gave me. However, I was disappointed in the sales and disappointed that people still didn’t know it was out. But that’s why you keep going and let people be aware of you, so that’s what 2010 is all about.

3. Were you targeting a certain audience, specifically a gay audience with the techno beats and pop sound?
Actually I wasn’t. Now you know Rico Love and you know Rico Love was not sitting in the studio snapping his fingers saying this one right here we gonna do it for the kids (laughs). We just knew that there was this Euro crave going on, or something that we could tap in to, so that’s how we started making the music. You know, I do music for everybody, gay/straight, black white. There were a lot of the toughest guys that really loved “Hello Heartbreak”.

4. Do you have any plans for a re-release of that album?
There were plans for a re-release and there were plans for Europe to do a proper release, however I am just as stunned as everybody else that it didn’t take place. No reason why, it just didn’t happen.

5. With your next album, will you return to gospel or continue in the pop genre?
It will be the same as UNEXPECTED as far as the vibe I was going for. I think that I might add a couple more live musical elements, but I think I was on to something great. But who knows, maybe after that I will return to my gospel roots. I’m blessed to have two musical genres that I can fall back on.

6. Have you started on the new album yet?
I have started, my blackberry is full of concepts and the people that I would like to work with (laughs). I have dibbled and dabbled in the studio and laid down some demos, and who knows, those demos may be songs that go on my next album.

7. How did you feel about some of the critics opinions when you decided to do a pop album versus gospel?
It was crazy because the masses or majority of the world knew me as Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child and we were an R&B, pop group. It was like what did I go back to, what did I neglect. Both world’s can be very protective of their artist, and in the gospel world they want to keep their music “purer”. People have to realize most of got out start in the church as little children. But I have people that will still support me regardless of which genre I do.

8. Now we know that you started out as a backup singer for Monica, when was the last time that you have spoken to her?
We have talked on the phone and texted each other. We have funny moments because I watch her show on BET and if I see something funny then I will text her about it. I’m very happy for her; she is really doing her thing. She’s an awesome mother now for 2 little boys. She has always been a very nurturing person and I’m really proud of her.

9. Now to Destinys Child, how did you get introduced to the girls?
Well at the time, one of Monica’s dancers was actually Destiny’s Child choreographer. She told DC about me and I got the phone call. Actually DC opened up for Monica while we were on tour. A lot of people don’t know this but when I would meet Destiny’s Child it would only be Beyonce and Kelly. I recently met Letoya for the first time about 2 or 3 years ago. I have never met Latavia, I don’t know of anything about her, other than what is put out in the media. But I would only meet Beyonce and Kelly, and when I got into the group I always wondered how weird that was that I would only have communications with B and Kelly. But when I flew to Houston I just sung a song for them and that was it. So I waited a couple days and then I got the phone call and the rest is history.

10. How did you guys feel when the group broke up? Did you guys cry?
Well for the Destiny Fulfilled tour we cried, but I think during the last show we were numb. I don’t think we even believed it until months later when we weren’t doing shows together. All of us dealt with that separation in our own way. I cried a lot, but then I was like why am I crying when I can pick up the phone and call them. But we still hang out when were in each others cities, or if we are all in LA at the same time. We still hold that love for each other so we know for sure that that love will always be there.

11. Will the group ever do another album together?
I really don’t know, I’m giving you the honest to God answer, I really don’t.

12. What do you think the music industry is lacking in right now?
I think that a lot of guys have fallen into doing things that aren’t them. But I think a lot of artist like Maxwell and Ledisi are good at being them. I think a lot of us are guilty of putting what we want to do on the backburner to do music that we think will sell. But when you really be you then that is when you will succeed. I believe Lady GaGa every time I see her perform. I know Lady GaGa so I know that she isn’t putting on an act. That is her both on and off the stage, she is a sweet girl. You will believe Lady GaGa when you see her, at least I know I do. So I think more and more artists have to believe in what we are doing.

SOURCE